Last night, all the way from sunny San Francisco, Brian wrote in and offered our campaign a truly genius (and I don't believe I'm abusing the import of this word) suggestion with his "belly-rubbing" plan. I had given up most hope of reaching the unborn, but Brian imagined a way to circumvent the sensory-deprivation of a baby's host body - pat the belly. That's right, just rub it down, and in 18 years voting-age teens will pay back our favor with unqualified support. I happen to prefer this approach ever so slightly to another friend's recommendation that we compel all team members to get pregnant at the same time and rear intensely loyal voter-children. A bit invasive and cultish, I feared, if not strategically sound. So Brian, to thank you and encourage further explosions of show-stopping creativity, we invite you join us as a full-time contributor.
After all, a vote in the oven is worth two in the bush.
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